Budding Comedian Gifts

"She's changed so much since the sonogram."

If I knew how to read this, it would probably make me gag...

llama

'I'd give it five minutes if I were you'

'I may not know all the answers. I'm only eight seasons old.'

No animals were harmed during the writing of this book report....

'OK - drop it or I'll sing.'

'My 'What I Did Over The Weekend' report is about my hunting a 17,000 pound moose, deep inside Canada.Some or all of this report has been fictionalized for dramatic purposes.'

Flowers in a vase - $39. Flowers in a vahse - $79.

'What? Never heard of free range rearing?'

Comedy Writing 101: The Works of Steve Martin

We should do great at remote learning. We sure know our way around a remote!

"Indigenous: Living or occurring naturally in a particular environment... like my older sister in the bathroom."

"Is there a problem officer?"

I should be a writer when I grow up...

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

'I love your playing....especially when you stop!'

"Abstract Expressionism is definitely right for me at this stage of my career."

Child drawing fish from life by putting his head in a pond.

SALE

'Can you tell me what I've written? I can't read!'

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

Four children playing the flute.

'With my parents out of the house, I can finally start my long awaited mural project.'

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

"... And his piano teacher says that he definitely has Van Gough's ear for music."

"I sincerely hope you learned a lesson this time, Mark. Drawing cartoons on your homework will get you nowhere in life."

'Who I played in Summer Stock.'

'I have a feeling one day when he grows up he'll be an artist of some kind.'

"Someday you'll see my work in the employee break room at the Met."

'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit, today, sir - a ream of paper and a half-dozen pencils.'

I need to set upmy own company.

'Do I have to be creative?'

Creative Baby.