Brokerage Buff T-Shirts

'Believe it or not there actually was a time when we accepted money for executing trades up to 5,000 shares.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

The day the stock market went UP.

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

A fight in the Boardroom.

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

"What's a debenture?"

'Let me worry about the one percent inspiration, you just take care of the 99 percent perspiration.'

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

Business meeting, CEO is dressed strangely as he asks: 'Any questions?'

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

Royal Mail boss to become ITV boss.

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

Business of Fingerpointing Line Art

'What's wrong now?'

Sales chart is buildings in background.

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

I'm a self-made man!

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'