Brewery Critic Prints

If the government made beer. . . it would probably be the worst beer in the world.

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

'You wanted to be a wine maker in the worst way, Paul - and you've succeeded.'

Beer Stall

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

'The secret to life, my friend, is hoppiness!'

You said you wanted beer with hops !

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

'As Chuck's definition of terroir dragged past the 20-minute mark, Suzy concluded, the longer the explanation, the less likely you know what the word means.'

'We'll take it!'

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

Don Quixote

'So much for your theory that mixing two 50-point-rated wines equals one rated 100.'

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

"If the weather stays good, we could end up in a very prestigious 1992 Cabernet Sauvignon."

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

"Quick swig first?"

'Are you sure this wine is ten years old?' - 'Yes, I remember opening it ten years ago.'

"Where do you see yourself five beers from now?"

"A pint for me and one for the woad!"

Red Wine

Wine tasting

Lightest beer on the market. Carbonated with helium.