Bookworm Seeking Peace Gifts

'Could you guys do your bungee jumping somewhere else?'

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

hard-boiled egg...

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

Censors 'no' a good thing when they see it.

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

K9 Literati

The Da Vinci Cod

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

Publisher. "The Laws of Motion " is a little dry for a title, Mr. Newton. How about something catchier like "When Push Comes to Shove"?

Bug reading book has antennae that are lights.

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

"This is the way I like it - I pretend to be asleep and he doesn't bother me."

'Are you writing my symptoms, or is that your autobiography?'

A man reading 'Beach Chairs for Dummies'

"Read the book!""See the movie!"

Who says religion can't have a sense of humour.

The book is so much better than the film..

"You dawdle, daydream. You make lists of things to do but can't get started. You seem to be restricted from doing what you know you should be doing. These problems will dissolve when you read Chapter Ten of my new book, at eight dollars and ninety-five cents."

"So, you're telling me that you can't return, 'How to be a secret agent' because the final chapter instructed you to eat it after reading?"

1,000 places to see after you die by Shirley Maclaine.

"Convicts selling novels from prison? At least that could never happen here, eh Jones?"

'An alternative to having me psychoanalyze you is to write a book and have the critics do it.'

"I just remembered where I left my chew toy."

A man uses a reaching tool to keep a book far enough out for him to read it.

A dead plant in the environment section.

Pastoring for Dummies

"Do you have any bedtime stories that aren't about the former Yugoslavia?"

The Colonel at home.

"Poetry would be way more accessible if they just said what they meant."

"No, no, that's my copy of 'Being and Time'—look at the teeth marks along 'Heidegger'."

'I've relaxed, put my feet up - Now, where's that good book you promised me?'

'Let's face it, we've been getting desperate for new titles.'