Boardroom Bosses T-Shirts

"That's the game- somebody gets emasculated."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

'The good news is, we did as well as expected last quarter. The bad news is, we didn't expect to do too well.'

"Listen to everybody's opinions? Please, we're not that desperate."

"I see we're going up against the Big Guys."

"Oh dear...I don't think negotiations are going too well..."

"Before I read the financial report I have to ask... do any of you have a weapon?"

'It's my company, I'll decide whether I want to go to the partner's meeting or not.'

'Congratulations Smith, you got that promotion. Commiserations Reid, you got that demotion.'

The Importance of Planning Thoroughly in Advance

'As I see it, our choices are 'no' and 'hell no'.'

'Well, I'm not very satisfied with our customers, either.'

'By the time I climbed up to this job, I was too tired to do it.'

'You can't put him out to pasture - he owns the pasture!'

"He's not sleeping. He always dims his display while downloading data."

'Maybe you should reconsider those place cards, Ms Harris?' (Negotiation talks/Good Guys/Bad Guys)

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

'You're closer to the Big Guy than anyone. Will you help us kill him?'

"He'll never win this negotiation. He's saddled with numbers...but we have anecdotes."

'You myst blow at least a 2.3 on the 'drunk with power' breathalizer before they'll promote you to upper management.'

"When everyone's an 800 pound gorilla, nobody's an 800 pound gorilla.".

UBLIC RELATIONS IN CASE OF EMERGENCY BREAK GLASS

Presentation Skills: 1. Be Prepared.

'Chin up, Simpson, it's for the good of the firm.'

"I'm tired of being used as a scapegoat."

'Almost finished.'

Phil, I'm just too depleted to function. I need to take the afternoon off and recharge my batteries.

Our parent company is not pleased with our work. They want all of us to register for a few remedial MBA courses.

'I'm calling you out, account to account.'

"Well, we can tackle this now when we're exhausted from the week or wait until Monday when we're exhausted from the weekend."

'My advice to you Winslow is, don't be afraid to fail. Unless you know what's good for you!'

'At that point the meeting became chaotic, as everyone's medication seemed to wear off at the same time.'

'Don't go too far out on a limb - he'll send you to a branch office.'