Bike Repair Buff Pillows

'I need a really loud horn. My brakes are a bit spongy.'

"First aid box, puncture repair kit, mobile phone, energy bars and plenty of liquids; I think that's all eventualities covered..."

Drool Marks

You had me at vintage.

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

"A classic lowrider bike usually is built on a late 1960's Schwinn 20-inch frame."

'He's made an eco-friendly bamboo bike... unfortunately all the tomato plants have fallen down.'

Philip Nye – cycle chiropractor

'It's just what I always wanted!'

"Sorry, but that's a road racing bike. I'm a mountain bike specialist."

Mad Cyclist Disease, the latest problem to plague cyclists.

Tour de France champ Fausto Coppi

A man with a deflated bicycle stands in line at the tire inflator.

"Howard's gone on the Tour de France without his bicycle again."

Tetracycline: Bicycle built for 4 organisms.'

Bicycle Pie Chart

"I'm bored: Let's go and swoop over cyclists' heads and scare the heck out of them..."

'Before you say it's got some old parts, remember that you repaired it last time.'

Man-spreading, Dutch style.

Tour de France champ Octave Lapize

'I made a list of bikes I want to look at today. You may want to eat before we go, as this may take awhile.'

'How can I put this....?'

"Wait! Do you think the quick release bolts are a good idea?"

'Forget about going to the store for a bicycle patch. I used one of your nicotine patches.'

Car on bike.

Cyclist looks bemused as his efforts to pump up a flat tyre inflates the the bike frame instead.

'Never accuse me of not lending a hand. I've just sewn your bicycle patch on.'

Tour de France champion Jacques Anquetil

Jacques Anquetil

The Mechanic

Motorbike with side car is chased by a dog with a side car.

Wheelies Gang.

"Sounds like the problem is in the fan belt."

'Would you mind throwing out some of your spare motorcycle parts? I'd like to park my car in the garage.'

'Before you say it's got some old parts, remember that you repaired it last time.'