Bible Humor Fans Pillows

Unsurprisingly, it was auto-correct that introduced evil into the world.

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

"You're turn to grill tonight Adam, you make the best ribs."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

'Do you think that's wise?'

"Um, I notice there's nothing in here about pork."

Moses' Tablet

'The Lord spake to Moses? You mean voice mail?'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

After 39 years, 11 months, 28 days, Moses finally received the GPS he ordered from Amazon.

Fishing with God

"Hang on, isn't this the second pair of zebras we've had today?"

"Well, that certainly killed my buzz."

"What did you expect in the land of milk and honey?"

The Beer Garden of Eden: "This hard cider is life-changing. Try a sip."

KING HEROD INTERROGATES THE WISE MEN TO KNOW BABY JESUS'S WHEREABOUTS

"We've been wandering in the desert for forty years. But he's a man—would he ever ask directions?"

"This Adam and Eve thing -- Is there a warranty?"

Noah's life jacket demonstration

Adam and Eve toast next to a serpent bartender.

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

The Reason Ed isn't mentioned in the bible.

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

"But you can eat as much as you want from the tree of bullshit."

"Will you stop telling me to feed the Zebras? We just ate the zebras!"

"I knew you were mad when I found nettles in my fig leaf drawer."

"Have your people call my people."

'Psst, Noah - there's a rumour going round that the dodos are gay.'

How James and John became known as "Sons of Thunder".

"Lord, business is slow and I'm getting frustrated. If I change my name to 'Job' would that give me more PATIENTS?"

'Those are a few jokes to loosen up the crowd first...how do you like 'em?'

When Holy Cows are sent out to "Pastor"

"At lease we managed to stop the leak before the water reached 'E' Deck."