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Pamela Anderson Ward.

In his younger days Spock was quite the comedian.

'If you were disturbed by any issues raised, please call your mum.'

Pirate

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

Treasure Island Book.

"According to the map, the treasure should be right behind that door."

"Ever get the feeling you're being watched?"

'I like to greet the new team members myself.'

"Shall I let them breathe."

'I told my wife she had to choose between me and that precious boat of her's. She called my bluff. Can I sleep on your couch?'

It's only a remote, dear...if you want better programs you will need a wand.

'CANNONBALL!!' - Whale tours.

To the Greeks' dismay, before the Trojans discovered the horse it was stolen by portcullis pirates.

As Seen Watching TV

"We can deliver it Tuesday. If no one's home, we'll just slip it under the door."

Opera singer singing to her partner who is wearing a gas mask on due to her bad breath.

"The X files...the tooth is out there"

"This is their way of reminding us how we're losing our best hope for Olympic Gold."

'Books are okay, except they only get one channel.'

"The fancy dress store ran out of crutches."

Thru The Eyes Of A Lifeguard.

'Two large ones when you're ready please barkeeper'

'I haven't had the urge for a cigarette for two days. How's the patch working for you?'

"Let's just binge watch this."

"Thanks Dave. I don't know about you folks, but I can feel it coming in the air tonight."

"That was a fascinating regression. Apparently, you were a pirate in a previous life!"

Poirots of the Caribbean

Good Morning Britain has just achieved something previously thought impossible...by making Piers Morgan the most likeable man on screen.

Pirate Paddle Boat.