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Circus News

Randall couldn't wait to see what else the 'Magic Trash Can' could make disappear.

'You're going to have your future cut out for you, reading bedtime stories.'

"No chips, but I did snag the new Hiaasen."

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

Bagpipes in the bath.

"What you find 'boring' spies from all over the world would find extremely interesting."

'Jen, you knew when you married me, I was a 'corporate report' reading person - Not a 'summer fiction' reading person.'

Pre-nuptal Agreement.

Don't Waste A Moment! Put Down That Magazine And Get Fit While You Sit!

'I'm not working on a case, I'm looking for something interesting to read in the john.'

"You've been in long enough! Two more dives then out!"

"I'm enhancing my appreciation for the knowledge gathered by humankind."

"Did the cow that jumped over the moon have NASA funding?"

"And thirteen innocent logs perished in that fire they used to burn Joan."

"I'm sorry, Ma'am, but you'll have to put your dust jacket back on."

"My wife, my best friend and our prenup!"

"It says here we should get a lodger."

Husband burrows under sand to get a closer look at woman sunbathing topless at the beach.

"How can back to back be your favourite position?"

Cat going to litter box with newspaper to read.

A shark is reading a book entitled 'Swimming with the lawyers'.

Holiday Reading and Back to Work Reading

'How are you doing? I've got the frying pan on the cooker!'

Child reading on the toilet is abducted by aliens.

'Was it good for you?' 'I haven't finished yet!'

A bath at Boulogne. - Appalling position of Mr and Mrs Tomkins, who had a jib horse when the tide was coming in.

Man with piano in bath - "It's not the singing I'm complaining about."

Desert Island Books

"It's the super - he says a lot of short American fiction has been clogging the pipes in the basement."

'She said to read between the lines to infer the answer, but it's hard to see in between them because they're so close together.'

The Invention of Reading in Bed.

Fifty Shades of Yellow