Barbarian At Heart Mugs

Axes 'R' Us Store

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

"I don't care if it is itty-bitty. Turn it off!"

Dancing in pyjamas

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

I thought I was proposing to Sally, but evidently I was challenging her to a twenty year series of debates.

Trilby - 'Bonjour, Suzon!'

"Who ordered the bravest tuna on all the seven seas, anointed with the spice of faraway lands, on wheat toast?"

Trilby - Bridge in Paris.

"Aye, now that I'm retired, the can opener seemed more practical."

"It's such a nice day. Why don't you go outside and plagiarize something?"

"I had a lovely evening talking trash with you."

'Nothing like a Romantic stroll in Saturn's acid rain.'

Doctor to overweight patient: 'I assure you, stomach stapling is quite routine these days.'

John Galsworthy

"I just completely disagree with what you just said about America lacking focus."

'Would you like a romantic table or are you married?'

'Mom, Dad, this is Jennifer. We met early one morning and fell in love.'

'First time I've seen a law degree with an expiration date.'

Romance

Conan the Custodian.

"Shall I compare thee to an autumn day?"

"A word to the wise- never put on mascara when you're drunk."

"Have you seen his sippy skull?"

"So far I've gotten 2 bags of candy, 3 chocolate bars, and 5 bottles of sanitizer."

'He's having a bad feather day.'

"Will you please cut the 'Alas, poor Yorick' bit and open that chest?"

Pirate King

How did that enchantment go again? Must I spell out everything for you?!

"Like a lot of Beagles, he's pretty domesticated, but there's still some of the hunter in him."

"The only thing trivial about pursuing this trivial lawsuit is my fee!"

Octopus

"Our amazing son knows who Jaco Pastorius is!"

Trilby - 'I will not! I will not!'