Bank Advisor T-Shirts

'With these crazy markets, you have to diversify to protect your money. Put some under your mattress, some in your sock drawer, maybe some in a hole in the yard...'

"I was going to tell you it's a jungle out there, but I realize that's probably old news to you."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

'Now that I have your attention...'

British savings accounts

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

The day the stock market went UP.

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

'That's our mission statement.'

Albania and North Macedonia: entrance denied

Profit

Jack of all trades

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."

"So, we look to the fourth quarter as a time of healing."

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"