Back To Office Pillows

"We are keen on promoting social distancing but not to the extent of post to you to the Bahamas."

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

Back to work...

"Wake up Thomas, it's not 2020. There's no Zoom camera to turn off to hide yourself."

"Oh, Mrs. Horris, he just said his first words..!"

"I'll go back to school if you go back to the office."

"I'm learning to live with existence."

'You're hopeful - worrying about what underwear to wear for the office party!'

"How do we break it to them that work-from-home ends next week?"

'She's determined to combine a family and a career!'

Hand sanitizer

'How soon can I return to work? About fifteen minutes ago.'

"Any further comments? Alright then, we're adjourned."

In and In Too Deep Desk Organizers.

"We missed the meeting, but there might be a couple of the little muffins left."

"I take it this is your first interview since the start of lockdown?"

"I'm so happy to be back in the workforce I'll never complain out loud again about Mondays."

"First day back at work. Don't forget to get some office stationery."

"Now, Mrs. Stevens, go to work, relax, and leave the social engineering to us."

"I'm back. My family didn't want to spend more time with me."

The Horn of Unanswered Email

Mother racing to work for a company with day care and a health club.

"Agenda item 14 C, does anyone have any idea what happened in Game of Thrones?"

"You're on 'Ask Sadie.' What's your problem?!" "I want to go back to work." "But my son is still so young. I'd have to send him to preschool or day care. And then most of my salary would go to pay for that. So what should I do?" "You should do what we did in my day: Have six more kids and then let them all fend for themselves!" "If your eldest isn't a strong leader, it may get a little 'Lord of the Flies'-ish, but that builds character!" "...in the survivors."

"If someone hugs me my first day back, I'm going to just break into pieces."

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

In-tray, Out-tray, While you were on holiday-tray

"We're not doing virtual meetings anymore, Stu."

'It's OK to take your work home with you. It's not OK to bring your home to work with you.'

Working mother

"Good morning, Mother! We made you a desk salad."

"I propose we go with the second option."

"What do you think you're doing? You play with me every day for 15 months, and out of the blue, you're going to work?!"

"But first let's all congratulate Ted on his return to work."

"Holidays with the family... Boss, I'm so happy to be back again! May I do some unpaid extra hours please?"