Auto Specifications Prints

"What part of ‘Porsche 911 Targa 4S with direct fuel injection and VarioCam Plus’ don’t you understand?!"

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'Sorry, that was before the fed raised the interest rates.'

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

"Can I talk to someone who knows something?"

'Those are all highway miles. The previous owner was a pharmaceutical sales rep.'

Nice park. . .

"Fill'er up with testosterone."

'Nice smile.'

"You have $3,098 in the bank? I'm impressed! So...do you think about investing it?"

The average taxpayer will ultimately embrace the auto industry bailout. Hell, we sold em all that useless undercoating for all these years!

“Mileage is great, but I need to customize the leg holes.”

A man drives a car with the word "LAWYER" painted backwards on the front hood so that it can be read in the rear-view mirrors of other cars.

TS Motors Inc.

"It's redesigned to handle rolling over."

'The car dealership is letting me buy an expensive sports car, one piece at a time. I decided to buy the steering wheel first.'

"This one contains our tailgating deterrent feature."

QUICK OIL CHANGE & FLU SHOT

"Often, it's sullen and withdrawn, and then, suddenly, it becomes hostile and vengeful."

'Things are going from bad to worse in the auto industry.'

"Wow! This car has a continental kit, train horn, smoothed-out firewall, polyurethane bushings and a 2400-CFM fan! I have a long way to go!"

'It's ok, sir, we'll put you in touch with one of our grief counselors.'

Car dealers free hotdogs - "The best I can do is mustard and relish, ketchup and onions are optional."

"Seat belts unfastened? Excellent."

'Don't let any SUV's pass us.'

'I can't find the gears.' - 'I'm not surprised. They're strewn out on the road behind us.'

Boom Box

'Any chance of making this a 'catch and release', officer?'

A 'failed' brake check!