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"$2 per week isn't much of an allowance, Pop. When will I be old enough to get a cash rebate from Trump?"

'But Dad, all the other kids get a roth IRA as part of their allowance package.'

'I know about the birds and the bees. Tell me about the bears and the bulls.'

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"I'll go to my room and do my homework, but I want time and a half."

"So much for password protected."

The burden of carrying the Euro.

"Dad, this is Wendy, she's going to re-negotiate my allowance!"

'All I know is when it's the 'birds and bees' it's about sex; and when it's the 'bulls and bears' it's about money.'

'I've crunched the numbers and you can afford to increase my allowance by 15.5%.'

'In the future, if we're a little late with your allowance, don't just automatically turn it over to a collection agency.'

"We've decided to diversify our funds on some candy!"

'I can't afford to absorb the overhead anymore!'

You got into the college of my choice, and I got into the college of your choice. Now if we could just work something out...

I'd like to request a transfer to a household offering a higher allowance and fewer choices.

Greece Bowing Before Angela Merkel

"It would be better with a protein, but add-ons are so expensive."

The Boom-Bust Cycle of Capitalism

'...All profits are local.'

"I think you should provide a 401(k) with my allowance."

'I'm worth more than $3,000 as a federal income tax exemption. So how about a raise in my allowance?'

'I got that, Ms. Rafferty... now can we get on to student loans?'

"Would you like a glass too? They're five bucks."

'9K a year!? It's an outrage! At my level of attendance that's 3K per lecture!'

"Well, I thought of it as an innovative economic stimulus package, but the jury insisted on calling it securities fraud!"

'I already know about the birds and the bees. Tell me about investing my allowance for capital appreciation.'

'This isn't the dollar I deposited!'

'Sixty percent of my income is from newspaper delivery, 20% from odd jobs, and 20% from allowance.'

"My son's a commonwealth - I give him money to be independent."

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks-- When do I get paid'

"But it's helping me learn my math!"

"Well, Grandpa, I'd be just as happy if you put it all into musical bonds, and I could avoid all those endless tax burdens."

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