Aspiration Achiever Gifts

Barry had always wanted to be at the top of a food chain.

Self Help Section # 2

Butterfly Woman

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

Go! Means NOW!

What else is there to wish for?

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

And here's the office floor plan. The numbers indicate the recommended sequence in which to step on people on your way to the top.

The Salesman

'I can't believe I didn't get that promotion. So many people have passed me by I feel like a road sign on the highway to success.'

"How can you have a meteoric rise to the top in a one-story building?"

Not thinking BIG enough: Nickel & Dime Bank.

'That's the first cubicle I ever worked in.'

"Today we are going to find out if you can that leap."

Caged Businessman

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

"One day, I'll be the first woman!"

"You know, there's a corporate elevator."

If a moo can rise to the top, so can I.

"My daughter tells me you want to become a doctor."

"I really love school. There's only one problem. I think not having a college degree is holding me back."

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

"I've finally arrived. The C.E.O. stopped saying 'who the hell are you' whenever he sees me."

'What can you wish for?!... Oh, I don't know... Infinite wealth, beautiful women throwing themselves at your feet, fame and admiration, perhaps?... But, don't let me influence you.'

"Listen here pup, it's time you realized it's a "dog eat dog" world."

'I was speeding right along toward my goal of moving up from middle management, when a cost-cutting measure overtook me!'

"You used to be that ambitious."

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

"Obviously, I can't fly like you, but if you teach me, I can probably sing like you..."

A push in the right direction: 50c.

"He's a psychopath with megalomanic tendencies...I like that in a candidate!"

"It's a long term goal."

Wall Street has a one way arrow upwards.