Artistic Critique Lover Gifts

"Well, the x-rays show you have a little arthritis in your hands, but mostly they're just poorly drawn."

Da Vinci painting a grumpy version of Mona Lisa.

"Tell me, Chuck, is barbarism the natural state of mankind, and will it ultimately triumph?"

Jacques et Jille

"I loved your embarrassing personal essay in the 'Times.' "

'This painting's in very poor taste.' 'Yes. It's from his sour grapes period.'

It finally happened, models so thin they only consist of few molecules.

'I'm all talked out. Let's look into some gene therapy.'

Nutty Assistants

"Good Dad, Bad Dad"

The Doomed Character

"Museum directory: Male statues with big d**ks. Female statues with huge tits & fat butts."

"They learn how to say 'Gracias' and we're supposed to be thankful."

Fake Diplomas

Cartoon Crisis. . . Biden's already causing problems!

Soup art attack

'Britishness Test.'

"Of course, at present Mademoiselle's neck is too long, but our Mr. Francis is going to change all that."

'African Idol': A bushman is receiving the judge's opinion which is:' Dat was bad . . . it sound nutting like watta buffeelow!'

'They always off the mom.'

The Letters Of Jean-Paul Sartre To His Mother

"The technique is good, but somehow I feel that the artist didn't take enough time observing the subject."

"Is there someone here who is sensitive to the banking needs of women?"

"Of course I understand it. It's just some Grisham potboiler."

"Oh, shush! You live by Janet Maslin, you're going to die by Janet Maslin."

Abstract figures view Whistler's Arrangement in Grey and Black No.1.

"Can I tempt Madam with a piece of gum?"

Red Indian Management Meeting

The Tooters

'I've never seen so many chinese restaurants.'

"I like bad movies. I don't watch them, but I love the scathing reviews."