Art Industry Survivor Gifts

Al, I hear that only one out of 100 art school graduates goes on to make a living in art. That's where I was smart, Axel: I flunked out!

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

I will not talk in art class. I will not talk in art class. I will not talk in art class. I will not in art class. I will not talk in art class.

Lockdown casserole

'Shouldn't we spend a little time on the ARTS?'

"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."

Forms I cannot deal with / Forms I will not deal with

"Well..I think the old Thermograph machine I rescued from work goes a treat with our kitchen units."

"Move, Gary."

IN OUT UP DOWN AND ALL AROUND

"Stress is often associated with feelings of 'isolation'...It's really important that you see yourself as valued, as useful!"

"I have always depended on the content of strangers."

"I told my manager that I couldn't cope with the endless mind numbing paperwork. I said I'd had enough of the bureaucracy, that I had to get out."

It's a big misconception. Everyone thinks hell is all fire. Actually, it's all paperwork.'

Funding Cuts for the Arts

"But. . . editorial cartoons can make readers think!"

"Now on view: Old paintings by dead white men through whenever…"

Please help: National Endowment for the Arts

Painter's Duel.

"And in order to align the designated objectives withthe fiscally driven cross functional departmental...did you understand any of that?" "Only the blah! blah! bit."

This program is made possible by donations from Don and Mary Doughaberg, and from lowlifes like you who never get their names mentioned.

'He just had a near-work experience.'

A man is looking at a sign saying Exhibition of art exhibition jargon.

"Now cover those leftovers with lots of cheese. What they don't know won't hurt them."

"Oh, him? He's BORED CERTIFIED."

The fragrance of prosperity "Think of it not as pollution, but as the fragrance of prosperity."

A Low Budget Philharmonic Orchestra

CITY HALL, NO PROBLEM IS TOO BIG OR TOO SMALL., 'Oh, no, your problem isn't too big or too small - it's just too difficult.'

"Okay Mr. Jones, there are one or two little forms to fill in before we can discharge you."

Useful vs. Wasteful Spending . . . Arts Programs and Missile Defense Programs.

"He was almost caught up to the 90's."

Bureaucratic Hell

Landlord makes a song and dance about the rent at a theatre

"Viewers should be advised: the following debate on public funding for the arts contains violence and adult language."

Bureaucratic speech