Archivists Gifts

'Listen, I'm sure janitorial work is fascinating, and it's very generous offer... it's just that we're pretty selective about whose papers we archive here at Harvard.'

"What's this? Now we have to hunt, gather and collate?"

Thank You for Your Previously Boring Service

"Meet the scribe"

Historical memory is on life support.

"I imagined the Library of Congress would be much bigger."

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

'...then Johannes Gutenberg built the first bookcase'

"Oops! I just deleted all your files. Can you repeat everything you've ever told me?"

Letter Collecting Nerd

'From albums to 8-tracks to cassettes to CD's...What a long, loud trip it's been!'

The rain has been falling for so long the animals are pairing up and forming queues by the boat! It must be time for the Crick boat show...

Office worker pushing a pile of papers on trolley.

Catalogue of little books.

Bobbies library of jeans

(No caption. Signs on file cabinets drawers read, "Files Saved to Hard Drive," "Files Saved to Disk," "Files Saved to Traveldrive," "Trash.")

"I think I'll keep a diary..."

We have a nice selection of office artifacts, a typewriter, carbon paper, ashtrays, our CEO's last handwritten memo...

It's my biggest project - a database of all my sister's boyfriends.

Attic of hopes and dreams...

"My Gmail account is full. I can't get any more email." "So?" "I'll miss email. It was so old-timey. You could write hundreds or even thousands of words, with actual paragraphs." "People didn't see any little animations to show them you were typing. They had to actually wonder if you were going to reply." "And the spam was fun. You never got to hear from Nigerian princes while you're checking your texts." "Just delete stuff." "If you delete a few gigs of old emails, you'll be able to get n

"Great for worship then! Great for retail now!"

'Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?'

Megabyte Information Processing Center.

"Could you speak a little louder? I'm recording this."

Today's alpha-lesson is "Keep a journal." The average person lets life pass them by. The events of their lives fade into nothingness. An alpha knows that long after they're gone, their thoughts and experiences will be of great interest to historians. That's not an original thought. I read it in the papyrus Randus Maximus XIV left in a safe deposit box after he helped conquer Judea.

'Lost Diary'

"I've recorded every noise my baby makes, so that when he's older I can play it back and he can tell me what he was trying to say. . .!"

'The last Doctor to go into medical records has still not been found.'

Magic Ring to gain entry into Tolkien Archive

Dive in Archive.

''The Thinker' is an outdated concept.'

"I'm still looking, sir?"

Jewish Hall of Nachas