Anniversary Aficionados T-Shirts

It's the thought that counts...'on our first anniversary he gave me a pearl necklce. On our silver anniversary he gave me a colonoscopy!'

An old man and women are driving along with a 'Still married' sign on their car.

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

Shepherd and eurydice

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

Tartine

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

Playing Fetch.

Killer Executive Suits.

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

You're my Mona Lisa.

"This place has the best happy hour."

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

In his younger days Spock was quite the comedian.

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

Demure lady with gloves

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

LAY ZEE FUK

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

Sloaney Pony.

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

Cry babies.

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'