Alternative Holiday Planner Mugs

'I'm sorry, Miss, we don't accept Christmas dinner reservations.'

Santa Claus's Mail

Airlines

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

Mr. Punch in Venice

Italia tours

Heading off with a packed bag

'This one is a bit different - twelve Indian call centres in eight days.'

"Could you help me fit nine days work into five and still see my family?"

"I'll be there in three 'All Too Well's."

North Pole twinned with Amazon

Excess Baggage: Sooner or later all those vacation bills come due.

The Problem with On-the-fly Christmas Caroling

Wizard of Oz - repeat fees

"I know it’s a challenge, but it needs your input!" "...Your breadth of knowledge of different interest groups, religions...cultures!" "Right, so the staff Christmas meal will be a traditional lacto-vegan one at a Thai restaurant sometime in March?" "Do you think the Pagans will be OK with that?"

Man on beach realizes laying down flattens his stomach

'No, no, no. You guys are way off! This isn't even the cat. You guys are on the dog.'

'We must have everything... this is all that's left!'

A tourist struggling with loads of luggage

"We can't go. We don't have enough carbon offset credits to get to the Grand Canyon."

'Let it go, Amy.'

"Well, all I know is he left on vacation to unwind... and he never wound-up again!"

'The travel agent says there's nothing available on the port side. Do you want me to see if she's got anything on the sherry side?'

"I've been invited to two different thanksgivings...One with family, one with friends, which one do I go to?"

Magazines layout Christmas issues months in advance so a woe of cartoonists is struggling to draw Christmas gags in the July heat.

'I'm tired of sitting and staying.'

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

'Let's open presents Christmas Eve AND morning. That way Christmas lasts for TWO days.'

"Wait a minute- these are just the ten commandments of perfect mashed potatoes."