Alien Enthusiast Gifts

"Take us to your vodka."

"I have a feeling they are going to treat us like dirt."

50 Grays in the Shade

"What? You've never been to Waffle House? I guess it is kind of a regional thing."

"This plaque shows nine planets, but their transmissions say their system has eight."

Sewage Farm, "Bloody Hell, Crap Circles."

'Managing change is all about coping with the unexpected and you don't get more unexpected than this.'

'I know we're on planet earth but what planet are you on?'

Woman: 'I don't think I've ever met anyone quite like you before!'

'Hi, I'm calling to check to see if 'alien attack' is covered on my auto insurance...'

'You're kidding! Your leader is a man!'

Signs that your real husband has been aducted by aliens: 'I'm sorry/I was wrong/Tell me everything/You look beautiful/I need to listen better/I've been an idiot.'

'The one with four legs must be the leader.'

Captain Pointy No.5 - Skeptical about aliens

"I'm looking for a secure position in a less competitive academic environment."

'Don't worry they normally look like little humas during the early scans.'

Scientists predict that in in the future, space walks will become a regular occurrence.

'The Existential Files.'

'We're thinking of settling down here -- do you folks have bilingual education?'

"When you add up how much it costs for fuel, supplies, and getting a sitter, it doesn't seem worth it to invade Earth."

My department was abducted by aliens so there is no data between January and April.

"What a ripoff. We'll refuel at the next rest stop."

'You can't help but wonder what this will do to the market.'

'That? No, that isn't a UFO. It's on the ground now, and you've identified it. That makes it an IGO.'

'Now, don't panic -- we're just here to do a little stem-cell research.'

3C-Keep Your Eye On The Road

'Let's see ... you're from Jupiter? Here we go - you'll need form 1037-j.'

"Trying to raise a family, establish a career AND invade a planet? It's no wonder you feel stressed-out."

How life on Earth really got its start.

'These are humans. Normally they are quite harmless, but if you touch their food or make fun of their beliefs they can become VERY aggressive.'

'Doctor, before you meet the press to explain your theory about space aliens communicating with us, maybe you should take the tin foil off of your head.'

"We want to know when your freshly planted crop will be ready for us to make crop circles in it."

Visitor Parking.

"Let's stop and ask directions at Alpha Centauri, I said, but oh no, Mister clever stalks knows the way alright!"

"Better check with your mother first."