Alarms Aficionado T-Shirts

Wordplay: False Alarm - 'Only Kidding!'

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

"Meet the author"

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"He's taught himself work-life balance."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

Driverless cars rage.

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

"I'm seeing some dominance issues."

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity."

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

"What did you download at school today?"

"It said this 'Spilt Coffee' series afforded her a lifetime of lattes."

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

'Yes, it computed the answer in a bilionth of a second and printed it instantly, but until I find my glasses...'

"Ralph's smart car not only drives better than he does, it also works better. So we fired him and hired the car."

Bot Art: After da Vinci

"He's the best our AI recruitment algorithm could fund, unfortunately our AI is really stupid."

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

Like lambs to the slaughter, my ass.

"Of course I failed you — your essay was original and unique and obviously written by a human."

"I'm afraid I'll be replaced by a robot at work."

"Your feelings may be artificial, but that doesn't mean they're not real."

'Wow, talk about genius!'

'Upgrades? Yes, we've programmed it to excrete a few drops of water if it should lose a chess match. You know - tears.'

"Don't deny it. You only wanted me for my metadata."

"Has anyone else noticed that the efficiency experts seem a little robotic?"