Advice Column Fan Mugs

"...failing is ok."

"Dear Ask Sadie, My mom is always nagging me to clean my room. I don't see why I should have to. I like it the way it is. I don't nag at her for having a clean room, because I know that's how she likes it. How can I get her to just let me be?" "Excellent question. The thing is, it's your mother's job to shape you into a respectable person." "If you think 'being you' includes being dirty, that means you're a dirty, slovenly filth-beast..." "...who will end up alone and miserable because no liv

They try, but those crows can't make noises they used to. The lost caws!

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

'Man...You age great!'

"He's got a great future behind him!"

Support groups for car repairs.

"How was the play!"

'I've been happily married for 15 years... that covers 3 marriages.'

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, I am 62 years old and was fired from my job of 22 years just before xmas 2010. What should I do? Sincerely, Irene. Attack! Stop! Enough, Sadie. Haven't you been listening? The mean-spirited, virulent partisanship of talk show hosts must end. People were hurt and some died. Aren't you the ultimate partisan, you coot? That's different lady! Fasten your seatbelts.

Four years ago during a special episode of the Ask Sadie™ Show, our resident octogenarian asked listeners for advice about how she can deal with her midlife crisis. Dear Sadie, I was going to suggest you start a YouTube channel to share your advice with younger people. But YouTube just stabbed its content creators in the back. They stopped showing ads on videos discussing anything even remotely controversial. That's going to put so many important voices out of business. So I don't really have an

'No Ken. Watching football and drinking beer at the same time is NOT multi-tasking!'

... Scooby or not Scooby ... The bard is trying to think of a name for Hamlet's dog.

Ask Sadie. Actual questions from actual readers! Send your questions to asksadie@rudypark.com. Dear Ask Sadie, My mom is always nagging me to clean my room. I don't see why I should have to. I like it the way it is. I don't nag at her for having a clean room, because I know that's how she likes it. How can I get her to just let me be me? - Unhappy at Home. Excellent question. The thing is, it's your mother's job to shape you into a respectable person. If you think "being you" includes being dirt

It's the Ask Sadie Advice Hour. "Batfan" in Dallas, you're on. What's your problem?! House of Java Cybercafe. My girlfriend is refusing to go see "Justice League" because she things Marvel's take on the genre is the only way to do it. How do I get her to be more open-minded and tolerant? You don't! Just become less open-minded yourself. You can't change other people, you can only seek vengeance upon them. Um ... Do you happen to have Doctor Phil's number?

"Now...this piece of paper will reveal even more."

So...who is your provider ?

Miss Lonelyhearts Advice to the Lovelorn

Suicide

Penfriend

It's the Dr. Sadie Advice Hour. For the next two hours, I'll be taking your calls. You're on, Boise. What's your problem?! I don

'Just think of me as your life coach.'

'Don't rush me! I need some time to process everything.'

'Rock of Ages'

Waiting For Godot And The Cable Guy

"I can't see the food for the peas."

"I've decided to start groaning every time I have to move my body a little bit."

"Ask Sadie advice hour! What's your problem?!" "Being a high school student is literally killing me! I sit all day at school, and sit all evening doing my homework." "Stop yer sniveling!!! Every student since the beginning of time has had to deal with this problem." "Yes, you're sitting all day. But like any other teenager, you should be burning thousands of calories anyway." "The eye-rolling alone should burn up to 473 calories per hour. Pick up the pace, slacker!!!"

"It's the Ask Sadie advice hour. 'Shmernie' in Vermont, you're on. What's your problem?" "How do I know when it's time to give up? I've tried so hard to warn people about how they're getting screwed over, but they keep vot-- I mean, hanging out with the screwer-overers." "Give it up, 'Shmernie!' It's over!" "This reminds me of the time great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandmother Cohen's advice show answered a parchment from 'S

Ask Sadie. And now a real letter from an actual reader. Dear Sadie, You are infinitely wise and stately. You are a mix of Princess Di, Clint Eastwood, Einstein, and Michelle Obama. I, on the other hand, am such a loser. Do you have any advice? Signed, Rudy Park. Where to begin? I did not. The media does as it pleases.

'Tom, you have always had a great ear for music.'

Old Vampire with false teeth.

The Capital Sisters - Dory, Cory, and Io

Blackbeard needed help living up to his name.

Miss Manners: Inappropriate and Appropriate.