Adventure Parks Gifts

"Looks to be some kind of menu."

Narcissus! Come back!

Bitchbark Canoe

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."

"Again? This is the last time I'm letting you wear the pants with the little zipper."

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

Skiing.

Local Knowledge

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Faster, Georges, faster!

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

"What sorcery be this? Thine castle is bouncy!"

"Hi-yah!"

Things you don't want to see...(mountain goat falls past climbers).

"Alright! Whoa! Yes! More boiled food!"

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

Servant brings king skateboard on pillow.

Sausages.

"Remember, pregnancy is like taking an exciting thrill ride at an amusement park only the seats are larger."

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

A tourist inadvertently destroying the place he is visiting

Ice fisher.

'Relax, it's just like riding a rollercoaster.'

Warning, ski season abruptly ends here.

'Echo Tourism'

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

Wine enthusiast tries to make his way to Cork.

Hay Rides $10

'He rides in the car with his head out the window a lot.'