Admirer Of Irony Mugs

"I've been thinking of donating my body to science"

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

Made in China

"Where is everyone?" "You had 'everyone' killed." "Stalin family reunion"

'When he said it would be 'me and him against the world' I had no idea everyone was already mad at him.'

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

Angel wears t-shirt with logo: YOLO.

"I thought it would be appropriate to have a band playing as we went down."

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

"Grant them amnesty and then hang them."

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

Right-thinking people against wrong-thinking people

'You keep turning them out and I'll dig a parking garage.'

Please help. Always in the wrong place at the wrong time.

'... But, wouldn't that be kind of like, cannibalism?'

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."

'I want my lectures to have entertainment value.'

'You're proposing to me with, cubic zirconias?... But, you're a diamond dealer!'

Dear Author: We really are tickled by your persistence. Sincerely, The Editors.

"Of course no one wants a forest fire anywhere, anytime. It can be devastating. That's why I feel so guilty."

Leaking Hudson River paintings.

'I'm afraid Mr. Caldwell doesn't want to see you now. However, you're free to visit his web site.'

Priest's x-ray showing his crucifix.

"That's an early Vermeer, very early."

Peace bomb.

"When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one person to dissolve the marital bonds which have connected her with another..."

'Huh, that Will Shakespeare, a man of few words.'

An artist creates a sculpture of a "thumbs up" and is then crushed by it.

"The house next door is slated for demolition, but your house is in the way."

In 1682 in a remote cave in the Ural Mountains, Heinrick Glaston discovers irony.

Perfection Troubleshootors.

"No worries. I'm well-prepped and ready for anything they might throw at me."

"Oh sure, it's easy to blame your husband, when he's not here to defend himself."

'I only make predictions in retrospect.'