Academic Underdog Enthusiasts Prints

Well, wish me luck. Mom and dad can handle an 'A' and two 'B's, but I've REAL-L-L-L-Y got to spin the 'D' in math!

Scarcity

Scientists are sexy

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

'She flunked me, but I plea-bargained my way up to a C-plus!'

"I was planning to grow old with Matthew Nelson, but it looks like I'll be growing old with my algebra teacher."

Personnel. I've heard of "magna cum laude" and "summa cum laude," but I've never heard of a person graduating "persona non grata." (Published originally on June 3, 1981.)

Ten Years to get the Ph.D

"And in the category of 'The Most Amazing Comeback from an Academic Nosedive,' the winner is..."

"And just how do you expect to become a made man, son, without a solid liberal-arts education?"

He's slow and can't see out of one eye, but watch out for his left hook.

"Remember—we're not Eagles fans or Patriots fans. We're Tom Brady Somehow Gets Humiliated fans."

"If we only use 10% of our brains, how am I supposed to get passing grades?"

Max Weber

'After being here for more than forty years - as undergraduate, graduate student instructor, professor - what saddens me most is that this was not the college of my choice.'

"Don't pull any wisdom teeth. I need all the help I can get in school."

Ant holds up the word 'TRIUMPH'.

"Millstone is not yet a full professor."

Psychology Dept. Faculty Evaluations Today. I can't tell if it's my id or my ego, but I'm really craving a promotion.

"As a summation of our work it's pretty accurate...apart from the beginning, middle and end of all the words in between!"

'You've spent the last 20 years in college. What made you stop hiding from the real world?'

'What I don't understand, is how a guy named Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart stayed out of fights long enough to compose any music.'

'There'll be a slight delay. The chef is cramming for his nutrition finals.'

Cambridge Dons Researching Gravity.

'At least you won't have to worry about the rising costs of a college education.'

'The good news is that you don't have any long-term memory loss. The bad news is it's all MIDTERM memory loss.'

'That should be good for quite a few doctoral dissertations in the future.'

'...no you can't phone a friend!'

'That's it?'

Emile Durkheim

"In conclusion, I hope you all make plenty of money to donate to your alma mater."

"These days, professor it's "T.V. punditry or perish.""

Let me guess...you peed on your homework again!

Masochistic Soccer Fan

"Gentlemen - raise your glasses'