Academic Champion Pillows

"Why are you so excited about school starting?"

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

Girl does mathematical equation. Man says 'Tut! Teenagers today and their problems ...'

"It says 'break glass' but it doesn't say what glass!'

"Eventually, you have to stop visualizing yourself doing well on the test, and actually do the test."

'I really crammed last night.'

Nervous Oral Testing

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

Children's education

'We'd like to form a support group for homework anxiety.'

National Academy of Sport

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

"An excellent defense. Let's give her the doctorate."

Football team discussions.

The Giamatti era

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

'And from this point follow me very carefully.'

'Gifted class, indeed. One is gifted in science, but he can't read - one is gifted in reading, but won't even try math...'

Professor McWit, Didn't Publish, So Perished.

'What makes me mad, I was only a couple seats away from all the right answers!'

Too much homework: kid with two backpacks.

Teacher boxing book: 'As I told you, today we're gonna really hit the books!'

Baseball players and their qualifications.

"Ted doesn't test well."

Examiners.

"'How to Buy Tickets on Bezos' Spaceship so You Can Live to See Your Teens,' by Chloe Butler."

Help. High performing teacher trapped in low performing pay scale.

Lessons.

'I'll pause for your moans and groans.'

"That Melinda Alvarez thinks she's so smart! Well, I've been studying, and I'm gonna teach her a lesson on the test we have today!"

"It's your job to work hard and get good grades, David. It's my job to make your mother laugh."

'There is NO way I can perform under that kind of pressure!'