Absurdist Cartoon Admirer Prints

Static cling cows.

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"The article you sent me on how technology causes stress crashed my computer."

"How long before the clinical trials are over?"

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

"We didn’t have enough in the budget to replace you with a real robot."

"Sure, it's a break you can live with... but screw one more socket and you're toast!"

'That's what I like about you Roberts, you're not afraid to get out there and take a risk.'

IRS: The country is broke, but your taxes cannot be construed as 'Charity to the Poor'.

God Bless America, God Help Syria

Attorney At Law: Today's special - Bankruptcy and Divorce. Two for the price of one.

'I'm afraid there's been a 23% cut in the 'empathy and compassion' budget so you'll have to tell him to sod off now!'

"You'll go far...you think like a man..."

'You may have an adverse reaction when I administer this. It's your medical bill.'

Oil in Nigeria.

'Remember Jones, your organs are worth more to us than your intellectual property.'

'There's a conglomerate of malcontents here to see you, sir.'

'There he goes over the bag limit again!'

'... and make it look like an accident.'

'Mr. Putin, annexation of Crimea was nice, but wouldn't Ukraine, Lithuania, Estonia, and Latvia also be nice addictions to your Empire?'

Car Rides - Cats

"Don't panic Daisy dear. You can relax your buttocks, it's not the vet, it's the chimney sweep."

There IS a Santa Claus.

NHS Suicide Counselling

'Extreme acupuncture.'

"You've sacrificed a lot for the company."

"We can't have Single Payer - what will people do without claim denials and endless hoops to jump through?"

Other People

"Not dead, nonsense! According to the computer you are dead! . . . Please don't waste anymore of out valuable time and leave the operating room!"

"Be careful of what you say. The CEO is listening in."

"See that guy over there? Used to be a real headliner."