Podium Pundit Prints

Boris Johnson Loses

Sanna Marin party

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'At the sales department, we've got to meet our performance targets. We're not here to care about reality.'

"That's a very difficult problem to address, Ted, could you restate it as a solution?"

'Wow, are all these desserts for here, or are you going to stuff your faces in the privacy of your own home?'

Bill hits the ground running, makes a big splash early on, and rides a roller-coaster of insane popularity right into the "Where Are They Now?" Wilderness of Forgotten Celebrities.

'I use these ice cubes to make minor home repairs.'

'It Kicked!' - 'Punt, Drop or Tad?'

'I have a master's in 17th century Dutch feminist poetry, but I've never really used it.'

"I'm in here, rereading the great poets, myself among them."

Culture, Media and Sport Podium.

'Just one criticism of you review of last night's opening play - you omitted to mention that the theatre burnt down while you were supposed to be there!'

Wussapalooka

Siegfried Sassoon

Pie chart - What were we studying, again?

Loser's Podium.

'I have a twitter account to slag off my facebook friends and I use facebook to insult my followers on twitter.'

The Fishbowl Dynasty

"Of course my main concern is how the situation in Eastern Europe will affect the pennant race."

Old soldiers never die. They just become TV pundits.

Ben Okri

'Well,here's the answer to why your car has been running so rough in the mornings Mr.Tait...It's pregnant!'

'Ok cup cake looks like its time to meet your maker.'

Poetry Journal. Any good submissions over the internet? No -- Just the usual bloggerel.

"Yes, we can hear well at the back, but I'd be happy to change seats with anyone who can't..."

"If memory serves, the alternative to being a McGovern-nik was being a Nixon-nik."

A poison pen fights a poison mic.

"I blame the regulators for giving predatory pricing a bad name."

"These days, professor it's "T.V. punditry or perish.""

"I'm going to make eye contact only with this side because of the crick in my neck."

Edward Fitzgerald.

"Look! The name is Donder! Not Donner! It's Donder! Got it? Good!"

"He sold his fresh water before it melted."